My Grandma
Here she is, on her 99th birthday, making a grand entrance. So grateful to be alive. She died November 2008, a day after her 100th birthday, lucid to the end, grateful

* Louis comes to the USA

Click on the photo to enlarge. This photo is dated 1941 and shows Louis (age 22) wearing a white apron. He is behind the counter on the right side of the photo. The other people in the photograph are mostly African-American soldiers.

At the age of 17, Louis came to the USA on the USS President Jackson, by way of Hong Kong. He recalled there were many other Chinese passengers on the ship but he knew no one and was traveling alone. It must have been a rather lonely journey on that ship for a young man leaving his village for the first time in his life.

He recalled that the cost of the ticket was about $ 75.00. He landed in Seattle, Washington. At that time, his father Wong Gim Ming was living and working in Portland, Oregon. Louis had six weeks of waiting in the Immigration detention center before he could join his father.

After his entry was approved, he went to live in Portland with Gim Ming. A couple of months later, a letter came from China. His mother, Wong Toy Hong instructed him to go to Arizona. Her older brother, Mar Kim operated a restaurant at the Army post of Fort Huachuca. She wanted him to go there where she thought he had the opportunity to earn a decent income.

So, in Portland, Louis boarded a train to Arizona. On the way, he stopped in San Francisco where he was met by Sam Gong’s father. He stayed there for a couple of days before continuing by train to Los Angeles. He did not have any relatives or contacts in Los Angeles so he continued his journey without stopping there. There he boarded another train for Fort Huachuca. He did not speak English as he had only studied it for 3 years in junior high school in China. . When he was hungry, he did not know how to ask for food. He could, however write words in English so he wrote that he was hungry and showed it to the conductor. It worked, he soon had a sandwich in his hands. He also had piece of paper with his destination written on it and this he showed to the conductor, who replied ‘where is that?’ It turned out the train did not go to Fort Huachuca. Louis had to disembark in front of the General Store in Hereford and catch a bus to Fort Huachuca.

Louis was first born great-grandson, the first born grand son and the first born son. As a boy in this position, Louis was doted on. Louis recalled being carried by his great-grandfather to a designated meeting place that was approximately the halfway point between the households of Wong and Mar. He would then be handed over to this same uncle Mar Kim of Fort Huachuca who would carry him back to his family’s home for a visit.

While living in Fort Huachuca, Louis went to school in the morning in the town of Huachuca. He was 17 but he sat in a second-grade class. It was boring, he would fall asleep. In the afternoon, around 4 pm, he would go to work at the Café until 10 pm.

He found it very tiring, being the only relative there to help Mar Kim. Bobby’s father, who had been working at the Café had returned to China. Mar Kim’s nephew (his younger brother’s son, cousin of Louis) had fled back to China. Mar Kim had discovered this nephew in a compromising situation with Victoria. She was the Mexican cashier at the Mar Kim Café who also happened to be Mar Kim’s lady.

With these two relatives gone, there was no companionship for Louis. In such an isolated place, there was nothing to do. The only distraction from the boredom was the catalog from “Sears” or “Montgomery Ward”, however, there was not the pleasure of ordering from the catalog.

Louis asked Mar Kim for permission to leave Fort Huachuca. Mar Kim was a stubborn and hot-tempered man. Louis thought to himself, ‘it is never going to work out and he’s never going to let me out’. In 1937, he left while Mar Kim was away in Tucson on an errand. In other words, he ran away . He went to Sacramento. At this time, Gim Ming was based in Marysville and Louis made a visit to him.

Sacramento

In Sacramento, Louis found a job as a waiter at the Dime-A-Dance Dance Hall at I and 6^th Street. He was paid $ 40 each month. He was pleased with this salary as Mar Kim had paid him $ 20 each month. He lived at Sam Gong’s house.

Louis began to go to Adult School. School started at 9 am and was located at 13^th and G Street. He lived at 5^th and K Street. Every morning he would walk about 15 blocks to school. He recalls that halfway there, he would stop at a diner, put down a dime and drink a quart of milk. At 11 am, he would leave school and walk to ASIA CAFÉ at 7^th and K St. He worked there with Soo Ming’s father, Winston Wong. Business was booming while the County Fair was happening. The pay was $ 25 per month and with tips, Louis earned $ 100 each month. The owner’s cousin who was also employed there often did not show up for work. This led the owner to ask Louis to cease attending school so he could work more hours. Louis agreed to do this. When the County Fair finished, business was down and Louis was laid off. Winston (Soo Ming’s father) protested this injustice by quitting and telling them, ‘you guys can do all the work yourself.’ His view was that as Louis had agreed to quit school, it was unfair to lay him off now. The owner agreed to re-hire both of them. Shortly after that, Louis quit this job and headed to Los Angeles. He enrolled for one semester at Belmont High School while living with Gim Ming. The restaurant where he worked failed and closed. He returned to Sacramento and went to work at The China Clipper with Soo Ming’s father. It was located in the alley on 10^th St.

(Years later, Soo Ming, son of Winston, went to work as a waiter at the Coral Reef Restaurant which Louis managed. He was a happy-go-lucky fellow who enjoyed his mah-jong. The Pontiac that Yang and Zee drove around, known as ‘the green bomber’ was later given to Soo Ming. After mah-jong, in the early morning hours, he and other players would frequently go to Denny’s on Broadway in Sacramento (no longer there). He died tragically on Thanksgiving Day 1984, in the parking lot of Denny’s when he was shot by his estranged girlfriend who then shot herself).

Cincinnati, Ohio

In September or October 1938, at the age of 18 Louis went to Cincinnati, Ohio where he worked as a waiter in a restaurant. It was owned by Mein Goo’s (Lily) father. Louis was there for about 18 months.

Louis recalls that every day, some of the waiters would leave 2 cents out on the table closest to the door. A delivery of newspapers would be left on the table in place of the coins. At this time Japan had invaded China and it was being reported in the news. Louis would continually ask the other waiters about what was happening in the War and if they could tell him what town had been captured by the Japanese.

One day, when Louis began his usual quizzing of the readers of the newspapers, one of the waiters became impatient and threw the newspaper down. He snapped at Louis, "why don’t you look for yourself?" Louis said "If I could read, I would not be asking!" This spat prompted Louis to find a way to go to school to learn English. He went to the principal of a school who asked him why he was getting such a late start. Louis said he knew he had to build a good case so he said he had had to work to support his mother and younger brother. The principal told him he was impressed with his ambition and told him he would inquire about making arrangements on the following Monday. Louis was granted permission to attend grade school at age 18. He also took one class of English and one of history for students in the 8^th – 12^th grade. The history teacher, Mrs Walker told him ‘you come in half an hour earlier and I’ll help you’. He had to take every opportunity to study. When there were no tables to wait on, he would use that time to learn a new word.

It was here in Cincinnati that he first heard the blues music. When Bessie Smith's recordings were re-mastered and released, he bought all six albums, taped them and passed them on to some of his daughters.

Los Angeles

After Cincinnati, he returned to Los Angeles and re-enrolled at Belmont High School. He lived there with a friend of Gim Ming (his father). This man was married to a wife who was much younger than him. She kept offering to drive Louis to school, but he refused and took the bus instead. (This was the man who sponsored Kai sok, Kai bak’s younger brother. Kai sok and Kai bok were the sons of Louis’ godfather). A month later, Louis asked Gim Ming to come as he needed his help.. This man accused Louis of stealing a ring from his wife. Gim Ming came and asked Louis if he stole it. Louis was incredulous and asked him "don’t you believe me?"

Back to Fort Huachuca

When things did not work out in Los Angeles, Louis wrote to Mar Kim who said he would welcome his return to Fort Huachuca. Louis decided to go there while he waited until he was 21 to register for the draft. By this time, Mar Kim had become very successful; he owned three restaurants. He gave some shares of The Post Café to Louis. The manager of Post Café 2 was the nephew of a friend of Mar Kim. Somehow the discrepancy of a couple of thousand dollars was discovered by Louis and one of the cousins. It’s not clear if Louis reported it to Mar Kim but the manager went to Mar Kim and made up stories accusing Louis and the cousin of goofing off, as a way to discredit them. Louis said ‘he was finking on us’.

Mar Kim had developed friendships with influential people, including the Draft Board chairman, who assisted with delaying the draft of Louis into the Army. Later, when he did join the army, Louis went to Curtis Rye school to learn aircraft maintenance. He was assigned to California but asked for a transfer to Ohio so he could be near Mein Goo. It’s unclear whether or not he obtained this, but later, he did ask for discharge in Ohio and was in Cleveland. The son of Mrs. Walker (the history teacher) got Louis a job at a machine shop where they made license plates.

Mar Kim then asked Louis to return as his son had quit working at The Post Café. When Louis returned to Fort Huachuca after his Army service, he recalls signing a ten-year lease at ten dollars a month with the Department of Defense.

There are now two buildings inside Fort Huachuca, one named after Sam Kee and another after Mar Kim, to commemorate their contributions to the Army and the history of Fort Huachuca.

There are other posts in this blog about Sam Kee which are sourced from interviews of soldiers who served at Fort Huachuca.

* The Textile Merchant

Sandra's paternal grandfather Ying was a textile merchant in Toisan.  It is a small town that served as the trading post for a cluster of villages in the southern corner of China.

Toisan was dirt roads with potholes, with narrow two storied buildings jutting out along each side. The shop fronts were open, with the vendors seated to one side, often sipping a cup of tea with a customer or associate.

Inside Ying's shop on the commerce street of Toisan hung yardage cut to ten yards or so, draped over wooden rods so that there were no walls visible .  The floor to ceiling of colours, weaves and textures were the dark sombre matte cottons for everyday shirts and trousers to work in the fields, mud-coated black fabrics for humid summer days, shimmering floral encrusted brocades for the wedding dresses and plush matte velvets.  Every household in the surrounding five villages bought from him. He had a good eye for fabric and knew what to buy to please the women. There were no other fabric merchants in any of the surrounding districts.  Customers looking for fabric were his customers and his alone.

From this trade, he became a very wealthy man and bought land. He built a grand new house with a ceiling of exposed dark beams and a floor covered in beautiful expensive tiles.  They would wait for his oldest son to come home before they would move in.  His wife was sweet-natured, quiet but strong. She had fulfilled the duty of the wife by bearing a son as the first born. This son was slender, and graceful and like his father, possessed a talent for relishing beauty.

The wealthy Ying was also a trusted man. People gave him their money to keep for them. In that time and place, there were no banks. He had a safe and he kept their money locked up there.  His shop was of several levels and he had employees who would sell the fabrics and some who would make bespoke clothing.

Ying told his wife that there was a woman who sometimes worked for him and that because she was a skillful seamstress, he wanted to invite her to work for him on a regular basis. The message was that he was seeking his wife's permission to take this woman as his concubine. To express her disapproval, his wife gently reminded him of his age by speaking of their adult son who would soon be married.  That was the end of the discussion.

Sometime after that, he went away for business, as was his custom. No one knew where he went or who he was going to meet. The next day, his body was found wrapped in a straw mat outside a hotel. He had been robbed and murdered, probably poisoned. It was said that he was found dead in his hotel room but that the hoteliers did not want a corpse found in their hotel, so they dumped him outside.

His death created complications. There was no money in the safe. Had he taken it out with him when he went away? His wife had to sell jewelry, furniture and other belongings to raise funds to repay people who had given him their money to safeguard.

* The Escape

The village in which Sandra and her family lived in was close to a main road. The village of Mee Foon’s family was more remote, closer to the hills.

Sandra’s paternal grandmother had had her feet bound when she was young so now in her old age, walking was a painful, difficult exercise. It was impossible for her to move with haste if the time came to flee.

Both of Sandra’s grandmothers had had their feet bound. Girls had their feet bound from the age of 14 or 15. The more wealth the family had, the sooner it was done, sometimes at age 12 or 13. Because the girl was unable to walk unaided, she would have a servant by her side at all times.

What was once a sign of beauty and wealth was no longer so. In these times, it became a severe disadvantage. Whenever the family had to flee, the grandmother was always left behind ‘to look after the house’.

There were no sirens to warn people in the villages that the Japanese were on a bombing mission. Hearing the sound of aircraft was the trigger for the villagers to flee, however, those sounds were often the sound of routine air traffic.

The first time Sandra remembers fleeing from the Japanese was when Doris was an infant. Sandra would have been 13 or 14 years old. Baby Doris was tied to Sandra’s back and when Sandra ran, the baby was shook violently from side to side as well as up and down. Sandra recalls that Baby Doris had a look of terror on her face. Soon after, she began to have trouble breastfeeding and Sandra believes it may have been the trauma of the shaking and running.

One of Sandra’s relatives had a baby on her back and was found by Japanese soldiers. The family had been eating dinner and had not heard the warning calls that the Japanese were coming. Her family ran to the hills near the river. She became separated from her family as she ran with her baby to the hills that were closer by. She was captured and both she and her baby were killed. The Japanese would kill their prisoners by gunfire or bayonet. This woman left behind two sons and her husband.

Sandra remembers the time of early summer when the rice crop was turning yellow. It was a sign that it was ready to be harvested. From that time on, the Japanese threat increased and fleeing from their home became more frequent.

Two years on, in about 1945, the Japanese began to enter the villages. They went to Sam Fow (3^rd city) where one boards the ships and where Sandra’s school was located. They were afraid to stay at her village, so Sandra and her family went to the village where their old house was located, closer to the hills.

Here was the routine. They would arise before dawn and cook some rice to eat. Sandra would carry their supplies in two parcels slung from either end of a pole which went over her shoulders. Their supplies included the prized down filled comforter/doona which her father had given to Mee Foon, clothing, a small metal pail with a lid to hold the rice, salt, a bottle of oil and a chunk of ginger. Then they would lock the door, sit outside and wait for the signal. Someone from their village would position themselves at a lookout point on a hill to watch for coming Japanese.

During these flights from danger, they would sometimes hear gunfire. And sometimes there would be false alarms. Sandra recalls that for every day for more than a month, they would go through this routine to be ready to flee if the signal came. They would run to the hills or to Mee’s family home.

In the fields, the grass of the rice crop was in need of cutting but no workers had dared to travel to come help with this work. Villagers began to report they had heard that the Japanese were far away and were not coming yet. As these reports spread, people began to return to work the fields again. Gradually, the villagers would stay home for a few hours longer each day.

One day when most of the villagers fled their homes, Sandra and her family were among the few who decided to stay. It was raining that day. Perhaps they thought that they had had so many false alarms or that they were exhausted from the cycle of packing, carrying, running and returning or they thought the rain might be a reason for the invaders to pause their invasions.

Then, a neighbor called out and said the Japanese were coming. Sure enough, the Japanese appeared and they were on horseback. Sandra and her family started to run across the road to get to a hill. Sandra had baby Doris tied to her back and was holding a big black umbrella. When they realized they wouldn’t reach their hiding place in the hills, they began to run back to their house. Once inside, the secured the door and shut the windows.

Mee Foon instructed Sandra to don on her grandmother’s old clothes and to rub soot all over on her face and arms. She wanted to disguise Sandra’s youth and beauty. By making her look disgusting and dirty, Mee Foon thought this might protect her daughter from sexual assault. Then Mee Foon put Doris on her back and the two of them hid in a corner near the grandmother’s bed. Sandra climbed under Mee Foon’s bed. Also with them was a girl of 13 who was being cared for by Mee Foon while her mother had gone to work in the fields that day. She hid under the bed with the family servant. There were ceramic urns under the bed which were used to store seeds. The girl and servant slid behind these urns.

The dogs of the village were barking. Mee Foon told them ‘they are knocking on doors of the houses near the road. Be very quiet’. Sandra’s grandmother was checking to make sure they were all well hidden. She would not hide.

Sandra was terrified. She told her grandmother ‘I don’t want to hide her. Go get mother’. Mee Foon came and agreed. Sandra then strapped Doris on her back and the three of them went upstairs. They opened the door and went onto the roof of the adjoining house. They hid under the eaves. The rain came sloshing down as there were no drainage pipes. They were getting soaked. Doris was under some cover so she was not getting as wet.

They could hear the Japanese trying to break down the door of their home but it was a very solid door. One of the Japanese soldiers found a ladder and climbed up to the roof of their house and discovered them. Both Mee Foon and Sandra gave the thumbs up gesture to the soldiers, as a way of saying ‘we think you are great’ rather than express fear or hatred. A female neighbor was also on the roof of her house. She was dressed nicely and looked very attractive, compared to Sandra with her soot-covered face and old woman’s clothing. The Japanese solider jumped over to the rooftop to this neighbor.

Mee Foon seized the opportunity and told Sandra to run. They jumped onto another rooftop which was connected to theirs. They were now at a balcony which had a gap from the next building. It was a drop of 10-15 feet to the walkway below Mee Foon then instructed Sandra to jump from the balcony to the rooftop of the building opposite the balcony. Sandra said ‘I’m afraid. I don’t want to do it. I might fall’. Mee Foon said ‘you must go, for if they catch us, we will certainly die’. Sandra (with Baby Doris tied to her back) jumped onto the wet sloping rooftop, followed by Mee Foon and again they hid.

And again they were discovered by a Japanese soldier. Suddenly, a voice called out to him. It was another soldier who had found a trunk down on the ground at another home. He left them to explore as it probably contained valuables that he could loot. Mee Foon, Sandra with Doris then jumped over the walkway again to yet another sloping rooftop. They then went to a house at the far end where they knew someone was home. They called out to the occupant. The passage from the roof to the house had bricks stacked to block it. This neighbor removed the bricks and let them into her house to hide. It was warm inside. Her daughter was there. Altogether there was five of them. By then it was nearly dark.

* Louis Getsing's Paternal Ancestors

Louis’ great great grandfather was SONG GUN WONG he was an only child and very spoiled. As a child he was playing marbles or similar and ended up hitting his eye and blinding himself in one eye. His family was teased as he was growing up that he was “ruined” because he had been too indulged and he was now useless.
He grew up and had 5 sons and some daughters.

Son 1: DU GUAN WONG : We have met his decendants in China. They live in the “old” village. When we did the family trip in 1991 it was one of his family who gave us old rice bowls and also the family who went out to get some special grass to boil a brew for Lulu to drink for her cystitis.

Son 2: DU NAM WONG: (Louis’s great grandfather) He was the first in the family to go to the USA. This is our branch. . We need to look on the family tree document in Sacto that Ai Gong’s brother in Alameda created about 10 years ago to know how many children he had etc. He was the first person to go to USA. He was the father of MUN GONG WONG & BO GONG WONG (Louis’s grandfather).

Du Nam is the man with whiskers in the portrait (photograph). Louis carved a sculpture of him that was confiscated during the Cultural Revolution in China. That bust was returned in recent years and was still upstairs in the house in the village in 1999 when Jackie last visited .
Du Nam was told by a fortune teller that he would die by the age of 40 years, so he went back to China to die. He ended up living a very long life back in China.

It was DU NAM’s wife that would give Louis her bottom lip to suck on as a pacificer when he would cry as an infant!!! She also carried baby Louis in her arms for the first 40 days of his life. She would only give him to Mar Toy Hong (Dad’s mother) to breastfeed. She kept him in her arms day and night for the rest of that time.

Ha Goo remembers and told Mom that Du Nam’s wife was really mean and all girls were terrified of her because whenever she saw a girl child she would rap them on the head with her knuckles. As she grew old she completely changed and started to give money away instead of knuckles to the girls.

MUN GONG had 2 surviving sons and 2 surviving daughters. He went to USA and he was the sponsor of Gim Ming Wong to USA.
Daughter 1: Yang Goo Hoo
Daughter 2: 3 Goo Hoo (Tham goo hoo)
Son 1: Father of Chang Gong (the guy with the glass eye)
Son 2: 2 Gong (Ngee Gong) who is the grandfather of Jeanna, Father of Ho (The guy who swapped the ring that Kai Moo helped buy for Mom when he went back to China to wed.) and Moi Goo.

BO GONG (Louis’grandfather) had 10 children. 5 boys and 5 girls. Only 2 of the 5 boys survived, so they adopted some other boys to replace the deceased sons. Bo Gong had a bad fall as a child and it stunted his growth. His torso was short and so his hands reached down to his knees. Thus he could not go to America as he couldn’t do physical labor. BO GONG did very well for himself. He worked in HKG and had a shop called ACK ON CHENG in Sheung Wan. It was the “agent/fixer” (known as Zhong Hao) for Toisan going to USA. Upstairs there were beds for the bachelors. Downstairs there were lots of chairs and a counter. They would help with boat tickets, sending money, keeping and arranging documents etc. Mom went there too when she married Dad. They slept in Nam Ping hotel (Southern Peace Hotel) but would go “call” at the shop. Q Gong in HKG has taken us to see the location. It became a herbalist shop but I think it recent years it has been demolished and is now a highrise tower.

BO GONG’s Children:

Son 1: GIM MING WONG (Louis' father)
Son 2: DA MING WONG (Calgary, father of Simon)
Sons 3 – 5 died and were substituted by adoption of Nathan’s grandfather and Foo Sok’s grandfather.
Daughter 1: 3 Goo Hoo (Tham Goo Hoo) We have never seen her. Mom saw her once when they went to Canada in 1986. She lived another flight away from Calgary.
Daughter 2: 4 Goo Hoo (Thee Goo Hoo) Phoenix, very wealthy from 2 supermarkets , now deceased) ( she had a bulbous nose)
Daughter 3: 5 Goo Hoo (Mmm Goo Hoo) Seng’s mother

Son 3: DU QIN WONG : This branch had 5 sons, including a set of twins. Twin 1’s descendants are “FONG and WENG HEE who are also related to CHAI (Julie) Wong. Also related to Ha Goo (Ock Teng Yee’s wife) and Jiang her brother. Twin 2 was Ai Gong’s father
Their was a 3rd surviving son too.
Therefore Gim Ming’s father and Ai Gong’s grandfather were brothers

Son 4: DU DIEU WONG: This is the father of Sam Wong (Bok Gong and Bok Wong, Dora’s in-laws). He was the man who met Louis in San Francisco and it was because of them that Louis also chose to go to Sacramento.

Son 5: Unknown WONG: This was a poor branch of the family. Sandra remembers that when Gim Ming WONG would send money back to China he would send to them sometimes.

* Louis in the Air Force

This is what John Wong told me over lunch in September 2006.

Louis G Wong and John Wong (no relation) met around 1942 while both were in training at Patterson Field Air Force Base in Ohio. After 4 months, they left the USA in a convoy of over 100 ships from Norfolk, Virginia. According to John, the boat was a USS Liberty type boat, manufactured by Kaiser. The company they were in was THE FLYING TIGERS 407TH SERVICE GROUP. He said that the Flying Tigers was made of many outfits, most whom were of Chinese descent.

Their destination was GUILIN, China. Enroute, their ship had a minor collision so it became necessary to stop in Africa for a few days to repair the damage. After that, they went on through the Suez Canal and were near Egypt. During the night, the sound of torpedos / mine explosions out at sea was constant; John said this was unnerving.

During their journey, the Japanese had invaded Guilin and were now in occupation. Their plan to travel to Guilin was dropped and instead, they went to INDIA. During the 4 or 5 months they were there, they trained and had a ‘vacation’ according to John. (I remember that Louis told me that it was there that he saw the British officers walk down the street and without provocation, kick over/disrupt the stalls of the Indian street vendors – John confirmed this).

From India, they went onto to BURMA where they stayed for another 4 or 5 months. Then the unit went by truck over the HIMALAYAN mountains to KUNMING where the US base was headquartered. They were there for 6 months and during that time, they would be dispatched to other cities for 5-6 days at a time, such as Hangzhou and a place that sounded like “Oak-san” (which is what John said). When it was time to leave, they departed via an aircraft carrier from SHANGHAI back to the USA.

* Sandra meets her Father

Sandra grew up knowing of her father, Ming Lei, through the conversations she overheard. She said that in those days, adults did not explain things to children. She knew of him too by the gifts he sent from America. One year her mother received a cardigan with buttons made of dark bone, made of densely knit woolen yarn that was fine and smooth and in the deepest shade of fuchsia. Her grandmother, that is, Ming's mother received a navy cardigan. For his daughter, he sent two sets of a coat and matching hat.  She remembers one was a soft coral/peach color and the other a pale celadon green.  Sometimes, tins of biscuits came as gifts from him, brought by other villagers who had visited Hong Kong on their way home from the USA .  These tins were kept to store foods like peanuts or beans. They were exotic to this place where little of the outside world ever came to their lives of these people. 

When she was eleven or twelve, there had been talk of his return to the village. But soon the Japanese began their invasion of the smaller cities and towns in this part of China. The threat of attack created fear and this fear changed plans. Her father feared that if he came home to the village, the Japanese presence might make his return to the USA impossible.  It was a risk that he could not take as it was only from there that he was able to earn money to send home to his family. So on this occasion, his return to the village did not take place. He did not meet his daughter this time nor was he ever to see his mother and sister again. Instead, he traveled from Washington DC  to Hong Kong and his wife Mee Foon met him there– alone. She stayed there for several months.  When she returned, she was pregnant with Sandra’s sister, Doris. So though there were many signs of his existence, she never shared a moment of her childhood with him.

Plans were made that Sandra and her paternal grandmother would join her mother in Hong Kong. They would need to go to Hoi Seng to board a boat to Hong Kong. Sandra recalls that in those days, one had to go to a 'fixer' to organise the transport to the harbour town.   There was a man who  who would go from village to village, announcing the date of his next departure and taking bookings. Sandra and her mother each rode on the back of a bicycle as the men pedalled into the town.  They arrived at night at a boarding house. Just inside the building, in the middle of the room, there was a table where a fat man was sitting. At first, she felt a little afraid of this stranger. Then she remembered that some of the fat people she knew were not mean, but were jovial. This thought put her at ease. Her grandmother paid the man and they went upstairs to a large hall.  Many beds and many women were there.  Some of the young women were students, waiting to return to the USA to continue their studies.  Some were American-born. All were there to wait for the boat to take them to Hong Kong enroute to the USA.

They were there for a few days, waiting to be told when they could embark the boat.  Near the boarding house was an open air market.  She and her grandmother took a walk there.  Life was lived in village,  school, or visits to the villages of her relatives and the visits to the "3-8" markets near the home village. (The open-air marketplace that was open on the 3rd, 8th, 13th, 18th, 23rd, 28th of each month).  At this unfamiliar place, the market had things which were rarely seen at the "3-8" market. They bought some fruits and other treats,  taking small tastes while they wandered about the market. Suddenly a loud shrill siren was blasting - it was the warning of danger, that the Japanese were coming.  People began to run.   Sandra and her grandmother became disoriented and did not which way was back to the boarding house or which way they should go. They followed others and headed into the hills with the strangers.  Another siren sounded that was the signal that the coast was clear. They recognised the cook from the boarding house and accompanied him back to the boarding house.

They did board the boat soon after that and were in the hull crowded with others.  No seating of any sort.  A fishing boat.  The  boat was not anchored at a dock, but just in the open waters.  They were transported a few at a time on a smaller boat.  As the waves rose lifting the small boat up so that it was closer to the deck of the fishing boat, men on the boat would grab hold of a passenger and hoist them on. That was unnerving.  So there they were, sitting in the dark, fishy-smelling, damp hull, rocking back and forth from the waves hitting the boat.   It seemed like they were there for hours.  The flap on the deck was opened and light came into where they were.  People asked, 'have we arrived? are we in Hong Kong?' The men guffawed as they said we haven't even left the harbour.  The winds weren't there for sailing.  So back off the boat.  Sandra and her grandmother returned back to the village.  They couldn't fathom repeating that again.

Letters were sent from Hong Kong from her mother with details of her return to China and his return to Washington DC.  His mother and relatives prepared a feast to "bye sing", pay respects to ancestors and to make offerings for a safe journey for the husband and wife.  Sandra was playing with a younger girl from the next house.  They may have been jumping or climbing when a sound of something hitting the ground was heard.  Sandra picked up a small but heavy bag..  The girl's stepmother saw this and took it from Sandra's hands, saying that's mine.   Sandra went into the kitchen to tell her grandmother about the bag.  As she called to her grandmother, an aunt shooed her away.  Go back outside and play. your grandmother is busy now.  Later, when her mother returned home, she told her mother about this incident.  Her mother gasped.  It was her stash of jewellery and it was valuable.  The story of this will be detailed in "The Stepmother".

The meeting between father and daughter took place in another time and place. She had married Louis by then and had emigrated to America. The year was 1952. Sandra was twenty two years old and the mother of three young children. Her father Ming flew from Washington DC to Sacramento.

When she met him, he was dressed in a suit. She was struck by his sophistication and style, how Westernised he was in his bearing and appearance. He smoked cigarettes.  He gave her a pendant - in the shape of starfruit that is now on the charm bracelet.  

In the living room of her home, he sat across the room from her.  When asked what do you remember about this moment?  She said he said to her "Come sit on my lap as I have never held you as a child”. When asked if she did this, her face is alight with an ineffable smile and she nodded: there are no words to speak of what she had received at last that she never had as a child – a gesture of affection from her father.

In Washington DC, Ming had opened a restaurant called “Ying Haw” or, in Toisan dialect “Yeet Haw” . It means “Number One”. The war had brought many people to Washington DC and it was a good time for businesses like his. Yet, within a short time of opening his restaurant, the war was finished and the reason to be in Washington no longer existed for many. The patronage at his Ying Haw dropped dramatically. Depressed and in despair,  he began to drink.  By February or March of the following year, he had died, due to complications to his liver caused by alcohol abuse.

On the day he died,  Sandra and a friend were on the bus for one of their regular visits to Downtown Sacramento.  As usual, Louis was home with the children and she would return later in the afternoon so he could go to his job.  On the bus, Sandra felt uneasy.  As they arrived Downtown, she told her friend, I don't know what it is, but I feel like I have to go home.  Her friend was a little dismayed and said 'but we've only just arrived.' Sandra told her friend "you stay but I'll take the bus home".  The feeling to go back to her house was strong but she did not understand why.  As she walked towards the house from the bus stop, from the distance she recognised Bing, Louis' cousin.  He was walking from his car into the house. She wondered why he was there.   When she walked in,  one of Louis' aunts was there with the children.   The aunt told her - your father has died.  Louis has gone to the travel agency to buy tickets to go to Washington DC.

Leaving the children in the care of Gim Ming (Louis’ father), Louis and Sandra flew to Washington to bring her father to Sacramento for his burial. Sandra and her father had met only once in their lives.